I've been thinking a lot about relationships, or at least the pursuit of......

For some people, there exists a promise of greatness in love that motivates our every move. The time it takes to accomplish this is different for each one seeking that very rare blessing, which you may or may not obtain in a lifetime….. so what is it exactly that drives it… what is it exactly that creates a connection between two human beings who have no natural bond? What factors are at work internally to generate those attractions? The complicated part is that it is a different thing for each individual. For some it’s the physical element, purely an aesthetic issue to be drawn to someone. Usually where it starts….. but what grows, or conversely dies, from that point is the connectedness that we all strive to figure out. It puts life in fast forward when you have an emotional attachment to another human being….. when that person consumes your every thought and movement. Life changes focus in love, and yet it sometimes creates a blind spot so vast that you will inevitably annihilate yourself by a course of self destruction. It’s a fierce, soul-shaking pain to not be allowed to love with all your heart and soul. Whether it be by simple incompatibility, or mistakes you make on the way, or being denied the option from the object of your affections, or infatuations, whichever your specific predicament.

What a fascinating adventure….. to make the choice to put yourself completely out there to another person. No guarantee of anything but the adventure itself, and a story later in life to tell…. Tragic or otherwise, what a beautiful tale to be able to tell. Some don’t posses the courage….the emotional fortitude to take the chance. What a sad place to live, in hiding of the extremes, be it pure unbridled joy or horrific immobilizing pain….the full spectrum that can only come from a great love or a great loss. My greatest frustration is where does the fear come from? Almost always it’s a reaction to a past experience, disabling the possibility of the next one. We trudge through life, learning as we go and hanging on to each and every occurrence as though it is some sort of internal law within our own minds….killing a bit of our spirit each time. Only those that learn to unlearn can truly experience life. It’s a pretty simple choice really, yet so few people make the attempt.

So really, what it all boils down to is simple courage….. and without that, we are all on the long road to emotional mediocrity…….and nothing more. For me, I choose the adventure...... wherever it may take me.

-Cyn